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I love Mark Drisdoll, and here’s one of many reasons.

If you follow that link to his latest Washington Post article, you’ll find an opinion that echos Christian (and probably even a few non-Christian) women’s frustrations with “men these days,” or, as Mark calls them, “boys who can shave.”

This article definitely resonated with me. Especially this part….

“What happens if you walk into the church and try to find out what a man looks like? First of all, you’re not going to find a lot of guys in most evangelical churches. The least likely person to see in church is a single, twenty-something male. He is as rare at church as a vegan at a steak house….In the church, boys who can shave are cowards who are complainers…They don’t declare a major, church, theology, or fiancé. They don’t want to fail and they think if they don’t try, then they can’t fail. And by definition, that’s a failure.”

I think that one of the biggest ways the enemy is attacking modern Christian women is through “Christian” men. The church is full of awesome young women who are passionately following Christ (myself included). Yet if you look around the church, our options for Godly boyfriends/fiances/husbands have become sparse, if not non-existent. Our young singles ministry is a good example of this imbalance. At our last event, we had about 10-12 women show up, and only 4 men.

Several of my girlfriends have asked me (in frustration), “Where are the young, single Christian men?” I don’t know the answer, and I’m afraid of the obvious assumption (There aren’t any?).  Thanks to lack of options, many Christian women try to get creative and find Christian men outside of the church (easier said than done). Or, they try “missionary dating” (i’ve been guilty of this method), which basically involves dating someone who is NOT a Christian in hopes that they will eventually commit their life to Jesus before you get too committed as a couple (this rarely ends well). Then there are those women who give up on finding a Christian man, and settle for someone whose values and beliefs come into direct contrast with their own (which requires great compromise of the heart). And then there are those who give up on dating altogether (oh hey there cat ladies!). Still, some of us (like Mark Drisdoll) have no hope in guys, but have hope for the guys because they are the glory of God (this requires prayer and supernatural intervention).

I’m glad Mark used a trending article as his jumping off point for – let’s be honest, his RANT – on the modern man-child. Sometimes I daydream about being born in another era (Mad Men makes the 50s-60s seem sexy, though rather dysfunctional), but then I remember how much I love air conditioning and Tivo. So I’m glad I’m a modern-day Christian woman and all, but all us Jesus-loving gals would love for some Christian men to show up in 2010. Or at least in the next decade. But preferably sooner.

Meanwhile we’ll all be praying.

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My Papa is so loved. After less than a week in the hospital, the hospice unit nurse said she would certainly miss him when he is discharged from the hospital, and will cry when he’s gone.

So sweet.

I’m glad other people get the honor of knowing and loving him, because knowing and loving James Louis Clark is definitely an honor. One of the biggest things he’s taught me is how to love well, and what it’s like to BE loved well. He never misses an opportunity to tell me that I am treasured, adored, precious, wonderful, etc. He’s been my biggest fan, and my best PR person. And throughout my life, he’s the one I knew I could always call for ANYTHING – no matter how outrageous – like an impromptu ride the airport in the middle of the night, or a place to live (more than a few times). He once drove 16 hours straight across 4 state lines just to escort me across the football field for Homecoming court. I couldn’t have been more proud to have him standing by my side that night – him in a suit, me in a dress with a gigantic Texas mum attached to my hip. I could share countless stories of his selflessness, sacrifice, and generosity. In this world, it’s rare to find a man you can depend on and admire. I’m so grateful for his example.

I’ve heard it said that unless you’ve been loved well by people in your life, specifically a father figure, it can be very hard to understand God’s love in that way. I think I struggled with that idea for awhile, because my relationship with my biological Dad is not as close. But when it dawned on me (thank you Mike Yearly) that “Abba” is actually a slang/familial word meaning “Papa,” I understood God’s love in a whole new way. As John Burke (not my uncle, but a different John Burke) wrote in Soul Revolution:

“You’ve never experienced a love whose source did NOT originate in God’s love for you.”

This means I have a God who thinks I’m treasured, adored, precious, wonderful, etc. I have a God who is on my side, who I can count on for anything, who is the ultimate generous giver. What an amazing gift. And I am forever grateful to my Papa for showing me what it means to love and be loved well, by both an earthy and Heavenly “Abba.”

There are some wonderfully deep truths in this song by The Submarines, and they have nothing to do with buying an iphone:

Everyday we wake up
We choose Love
We choose light
And we try, it’s too easy just to fall apart

Love can free us from all excess
From our deepest debts
Cause when our hearts are full we need much less

(my online shopping urges need to take note)

“Being single is a thousand times better than being in a bad relationship.” Neil Clark Warren

I posted a similar magazine article back in 2008. Now she’s turned it into a book! Do you agree with her viewpoint?

via Marry Him — A Look At The Divisive New Book That Urges You To ‘Settle’.

“When I get lonely these days, I think: So be lonely. Learn your way around loneliness. Make a map of it. Sit with it, for once in your life. Welcome to the human experience. Never again use another person’s body or emotions as a scratching post for your unfulfilled yearnings.”

– Eat Pray Love

a: [guys] have to find younger girls because those are the ones that will put up with their bullshit, just like we did. now we know better.

This is perhaps the most mature article I’ve read about love & marriage in a long time. Props to this confident writer.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/02/fashion/02love.html?_r=1&pagewanted=print

“The truth feels like the biggest sucker-punch of them all: it’s not a spouse or land or a job or money that brings us happiness. Those achievements, those relationships, can enhance our happiness, yes, but happiness has to start from within. Relying on any other equation can be lethal.”

“The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. And his pants. But you go for the stomach first, because that’s what classy women do.” – Bonnie, More To Love

Yes, this brilliant quote came from the pilot of More To Love, which I will be following with great interest and a healthy dose of skepticism.

http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/2009/07/more-to-love-fox-luke-conley.html?xid=rss-feed-tvwatch-%27More+to+Love%27+recap%3A+Weight+for+it

http://watching-tv.ew.com/2009/07/28/more-to-love-debut-poundsploitatio-dating/

http://www.patrolmag.com/times/1734/not-doing-it