I have always struggled with weight, save maybe the years I went through growth spurts as a kid. I’m not genetically set up to “win” in the weight loss category. My doctor confirmed my suspicions last month when after several blood tests and doctor visits, she looked at me and said, “I think what we’re dealing with here is a case of genetics.”

While some days I just want to throw in the towel and indulge on dessert (and yes, I do that more often than I should), I still try to at least eat healthy meals. If you could look at my diet now and compare it to the years I lived in the Midwest and South, you’d notice a dramatic difference. Shortly after I moved to Cali I began to introduce new “healthy” foods into my daily life. I used to think vegetables were the grossest thing ever (clearly, I had no idea how to prepare them right), but now I eat a salad or veggie filled 1/2 sandwich nearly everyday. Part of this lifestyle change is a result of being adventurous and trying new things, and part of it can be attributed to my changing taste buds. As my tastes change, I’ve noticed that my body will experience weird cravings for foods I used to hate. For example, I used to absolutely despise pickles. I used to tell people that the day I crave pickles is the day you’ll know I’m pregnant. Well, a few months ago I accidentally ate some pickles on a turkey burger, and I fell in love with their vinagery saltiness. Since that day, I have yet to order my deli sandwich or burger without them. Therefore, I would like to publicly redact my pregnancy / pickles statement, as there is no possible way I could be pregnant, save miraculous conception.

Now that we’ve cleared that up…

While I have made some healthy changes (pickles are questionable), I know I could always do better.* I read this article called “Secrets of Thin People,” in Real Simple Magazine. I really liked the idea that, “Thin people are selective gourmets…Our bodies have a budget, like our checkbook. We should ‘spend’ on what we eat selectively, not compulsively.” It sounds simple, but it’s really a helpful idea. I’m genetically set up to be overweight, so I have a smaller budget (hmm, just like my REAL bank account). Not fair, but unchangeable nonetheless. Don’t get me wrong, I realize that diet and exercise are major players, but they will only take you so far. I’ve incorporated healthier foods into my diet and I also hit the gym or trail about four times a week, but I’m not thin. I’m far from it. This creates and ongoing battle within me. Part of me knows I’m basically healthy and that I should love and accept my sexy curves, “Clark thighs,” and extra junk in the trunk, but the other part is utterly and completely disgusted with myself. I know I’m not alone with this  love/hate relationship with my body. But I do wish that, as a society, we would start to recognize HEALTHY fuller figured girls as beautiful in their own right.

Take Megan McCain for example. A journalist called her fat! To my knowledge, Megan is not an aspiring supermodel or starlet, so she’s not expected to be tiny. She’s a political writer! And she is NOT fat. She is gorgeous. I really wish the media would stop labeling normal, healthy girls as “fat.” I also wish guys would do the same, but that’s opening a whole other can…

Here’s to the ongoing battle of the buldge, and to those who love/hate their bodies. May we all remember to put our HEALTH first!

*Totally not willing to give up my dark chocolate. Non-negotiable  :).

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